Probly my favorite week of the whole year.
Everything about is spiritual in nature. Beginning with Palm Sunday. I miss the days when my girls were little and we'd make palm leaves out of paper and tell the story of Jesus's Triumphal Entry into Jerusalem on a donkey never ridden before and how the people lined the streets with their palm leaves and waved them and tossed them on the ground before Him as He came. It's why I have a palm tree in my living room.... because I love this story and the tree growing in my front window is a simple reminder of what I believe... that when He does come again I hope I'll recognize Him and show Him the reverence and love deserving of the one and only King of Kings.
Everything is blooming.... and everywhere that just born, brand new green is popping up. There's nothing like "new green". And the pale pink buds and blossoms. And a blue March sky. Only Divinity could have come up with a palate of such subtle grandeur.
It all makes me feel alive and real and at complete peace and joyful and awestruck and humbled and............. grateful........ soo grateful.
This past week my all-time (since I was 15) favorite line from a hymn has been replaying through my mind everyday.... over and over.... "I marvel that He would descend from His throne divine, to rescue a soul so rebellious and proud as mine" (I Stand All Amazed, Charles H. Gabriel). And nothing fills me with more peace than this.... and yet it stops me in my tracks because I can't even begin to understand this.... why someone would do this for me? And I think how I'm part of this great, big world and He had to do it for everyone anyway, so lucky for me I jumped on the bandwagon and totally lucked out. But then that quote that goes something like "but if only for you, He still would have done it all".... and I know.... I know.
This week a quote from Brad Wilcox showed up somewhere on social media and it's fit in perfectly with a few things I've been working on the last 3 months (accepting and showing grace)
"Grace is not a booster
engine that kicks in once our fuel
supply is exhausted. Rather, it is our
constant energy source. It is not the light at the end of the tunnel but the
light that moves us through the tunnel. Grace is not achieved somewhere down
the road. It is received right here and right now. It is not a
finishing touch;
it is the Finisher’s touch."
The Road to Emmaus by J. Kirk Richards
And here I've been studying grace.... digging up everything
I can find....praying for it... trying to practice it... and yet I still can't
comprehend it. It’s beyond my grasp in understanding..... soooo far
beyond me. And in my goal to show grace to others I felt like I had to
have some knowledge of it. It all goes back to that quote I have on my
fridge "we're all just walking each other home".... and a realization... suddenly it dawns on me.... ALL I have to do
is walk. For myself and for those around me. When I think about the
Savior I always picture Him walking. He was never in a rush. Wow.
How would that be.... to never be rushing.... because people were always
His focus and He never wanted to miss anyone. He didn't skip over anyone.
In a way you could say that no one got past Him (something Ally and I
have been discussing and I'll write about another time, soon). He never
saw the outer self. He knew.... He KNEW what was beneath.... He saw into
the heart... because He already knew what was in it.... He knows that heart
better than the person it beats for every moment. No wonder He didn't
want or need to rush. And as I type this after three months, I am finally
feeling like I have a small, tiny tiny, connection with grace... I'm finally
getting it.... a little. I can't show the kind of grace the Savior shows
to us because His grace is the kind that ONLY He can have... and I couldn't
even begin to try.... it's not possible. What I can do is take the time
to stop and really see others.... really see them. Of
course not everyone is going to care or even want this from me or anyone for that
matter. But don't we all in some small way want to be seen, heard,
acknowledged, forgiven..... loved?? I don't care who you are or how
highly you think of yourself or how much you believe you don't need others,
everyone does at some point. Everyone needs to feel like they mean
something. So, in my small understanding of showing grace to others, for
me it means to really see people.... to take time for people. To leave my
insecurities, weaknesses, vulnerabilities, what have you, behind and reach out....
even when it's the most difficult.... especially when
it's most difficult.
This week something else popped up on social media and it's been MY saving grace....
This beautiful child singing 'Gethsemane'. I fall asleep hearing it in my mind every night....
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZWIx24J00Wc&feature=youtu.be
'Gethsemane'
Jenny Oakes Baker
Jesus climbed the hill
To the garden still
His steps were heavy and slow
Love and a prayer
Took Him there
To the place only He could go
Gethsemane
Jesus loves me
So He went willingly
To Gethsemane
He felt all that was sad, wicked or bad
All the pain we would ever know
While His friends were asleep
He fought to keep
His promise made long ago
Gethsemane
Jesus loves me
So He went willingly
To Gethsemane
The hardest thing That ever was done
The greatest pain that ever was known
The biggest battle that ever was won
This was done by Jesus.
The fight was won by Jesus.
Gethsemane
Jesus loves me
So he gave His gift to me
In Gethsemane
Gethsemane
Jesus loves me
So he gives His gift to me
From Gethsemane